Care group and bible discussions

I am not going for anymore care group and bible discussions.It is not the fault of anyone in any care group that I don't want to go. I few things comes to mind....

1) I tend to get irritated by people that don't seem to talk sense.

Yes, I am not judging those people. It is just that when I hear people trying to explain things that seems to contradict the bible there is this tension in me that gets me somewhat irritated.... I don't know why. Usually I just keep quiet but after a while it just becomes a drag on me.

2) You tend to get this person that can elaborate with 10000 words a point that can be explained in 20 words or less.

Yes these people will talk and talk and talk just to explain a simple and well understood point. I don't get why can't people get straight to the point without repeating and quoting examples after examples as if the listeners are mental retards. Don't get me wrong, I don't get offended by them I am just really bored hearing them.

3) I learn a lot more about God studying the bible by myself

Yes I can go at my own pace and I can customize the way I study the bible. Besides I feel closer to God reading the bible as I pray. Something you can't do in a group bible study.

4) I rather socialize with Christians outside bible studies.

As I said bible studies with a group of christians is usually painfully boring to me. Studying the bible by myself brings me closer to God because of my alone time with God and His words.

Sure there will be some christian brothers and sisters that might despise me for my decisions but hey that will probably help me with to get friends I prefer. Well hopefully.

Another observation

I haven't blog  a while! Well I have been really busy. Anyway I had an observation today that was profound enough that I have to blog it to keep it in memory.

We all know that if someone brag about themselves it can make them look bad especially if they over do it. It shows their insecurities and that they have a chip on their shoulders.

If you hear very good things about someone from other people he will look very good. However if that same person somehow review through conversations that he is not ashame to admit his weaknesses or vulnerabilities he will look extremely good.

I am not advocating anything here. I met a person like that today and it made a strong impression on me. Genuine confidence is always respected. I wonder why God made us to respect this trait.

How some people judge a software

You know one thing I find very very very astounding? Some people judge the quality or usefulness of a software by the size of memory it takes up.... So the next question is, how do you bloat up the size of a small software? I call it software cosmetics.

Another observation on people

Friend A of mine is jobless and looking for one. He asked another mate of mine(friend B) if he have found a job for him. The other guy said no I haven't found. (I over heard it in the badminton court) Friend B looked uneasy.

No too long latter friend B while talking to me expressed dislike to friend A on something rather trivial. At first I didn't get it but I figured B don't like A because he felt pressured when asked by A for help and he couldn't deliver in desperation. Now I have seen similar scenarios like this countless times in my life.

Aside: General rule when dealing with people you are not close with or you don't know. Don't ask for favors especially out of desperation when they may not be able to help.

I think this is due to a survival mechanism in human's to avoid desperate and needy people. Ideally we should help the needy and not discriminate them. Jesus did not avoid the sick and desperate people, in fact he went out to them and heal them and feed them, so it is not normal to feel pressured by desperate people. Or is it?

So which is it? humans are like that because of sinful nature? Or is it a natural survival instinct to avoid life burden and have a better chance of surviving due to less burden? Is it really a survival instinct like breathing or a result of sin?

A crappy badminton game?

I played badminton last sunday and a friend of mine I have known for years that is normally quite good in the game was playing like crap. So I ask him whats up with you dude? He said I am going on a first date with a girl latter that is why I can't concentrate. I said, I see, it is about time you grow up eh? (Jokingly)

So I asked what time is the appointment? he said 8 PM, I said goodness you better go back and get ready now dude you will be late. He said nevermind I am going in this outfit (sweaty and wet badminton outfit)

I said dude, this is your first date with her, she is not yours yet, you gotta impress her. He said, I know, but I am not smelly right?

At that point I decide to keep quiet because the situation can't be helped anymore.
If I have a son, one thing I will have to teach him is how to groom himself and then how to impress the other side with chivalry. I know chivalry is bs but hey it works lol

Unfairness

Recently someone my age committed suicide because he see himself as a failure in life. He have a "dead end job" he couldn't afford things like marriage and sadly our society expect more than what he can achieve. You see, I did say you can't blame him for being the way he is because, given a choice he wants to be capable and smart, given a choice he wants to be able to provide and succeed in life.

You might say, his stinking attitude led to a crappy life. True but that was the result of his up bringing and mind programming, is it totally his fault?. Did he choose his parents and the type of up bringing? Given a choice he would probably choose to be born in a well to do family that comes with good up bringing.

I have been thinking about this since at least 6 years old and I remember my mom getting a bit annoyed with me when I question all these things hahaha. I concluded that we can't blame incompetent people or "poor and useless" people for being who they are. They are the by product a world filled with unfairness and suffering. The catch is, we could be them by being born as them. The line between the average, rich and poor is very very thin. The similarity between the haves and have not is, God is the maker of them all. Despising the incapable and poor for being who they are just doesn't sound right.

The conviction in me is to do my best to make this world better for everyone. Hopefully someday if God bless me, I can have the privilege to have more influence in this area.

Being just smart is pretty useless

You may think you are smart, you may think you are a cut above the rest, perhaps you are, but unless you do something tangible with your smarts it doesn't matter how smart you are. Even if you are smart, it is just fleeting fantasy in your head, get it? useless fantasy. Geniuses and smart people are recognized in history and society for what they have uniquely produced NOT what they CAN produce, get it?

So being smart can pick apart people's argument, make them look stupid and what? Create enemies and more obstacles in their life? Smarts in a "wrong" way will not open doors unless it is used to produce. People appreciate builders not destroyers. It doesn't matter how smart you are, if you use it to intimidate people, you will get no credit for it. Quite a few smart people I see are just too argumentative, or not motivated by anything more than their end of the month pay check. There is nothing wrong with only looking forward to your pay check every month and nothing else, just don't expect people to give you credit for whatever intelligence you have,

So for those people that are genuinely creative, intelligent or savants like, I say do something tangible and extraordinary with it(and that excludes arguing and debating, unless it is with someone else that equally enjoys it).

My Bad Habit

I notice when I am working on an unusual project or R n D I get excited and I work my butt off. But once I solve the hard parts of the project I tend to neglect and feel lazy about the rest which are important but straightforward.

In the future when I need a buisness partner he/she ideally is the kind that will follow through on the predictable and easy boring bits and finish the whole thing. He/she must take joy and pride in finishing a project because I take a lot more joy solving problems that haven't been solved then doing repetitive boring drills. It just weighs me down to the point that I find myself begging for death.

My problem

My major problem is, I don't pay enough attention to details. I see too far and too wide too fast.

ADD kids/people

People view them as trouble makers, irresponsible or perhaps hopeless. It is true that ADD people tend to get distracted easily and have trouble focusing. They tend to under perform in many areas of their life hence it is quite normal for people to label ADD people as dumb. But one thing people do not know about them is, they generally have a unique ability to hyper focus in areas that interest them and as a result, solve problems at a level that only highly gifted people can. Obsessive compulsive disorder is also linked to people with ADD. The link between genius and ADD have been known for a long time.

So here is my plea to people that are dealing with troublesome ADD kids. Be patient with them and learn how to nurture them in a loving environment because they truly are unpolished gems that have incredible potential to do amazing things.

Software developements

Writing softwares is my love ans passion(including implementing operation research algorithms). I was trying to figure out why. I concluded that I like it because it enables me to carry out my fantasy and explore my imaginations that have measurable impact in the real world. Software engineers have tremendous ability to build "game changing" systems. For a creative person it is an affordable way to express his creativity to the hilt.

If you are a software developer for a client I conclude that once in a few years or so it is good to rewrite the whole things from scratch. This is due to the fact that through out the life span of the software, it is subjected to changes and modification that can cause the code to run inefficiently. Efficient and tidy code is important to save money on future modifications. Untidy code will cost you more when the code needs modifications.